Yes, unbelievably there are still people in the world who have yet to experience the magic and madness of a Burn. I am one of those unfortunate few.
Burning Man and all its international mutant offspring have always been known to me. When I first saw the Malcolm in the Middle Episode where they attend the Burn I accessed my dial-up-powered search engine and asked Jeeves himself. I couldn’t believe that it was a real thing!
Since then, it’s always been something that I was vaguely aware of. Each year, the most beautifully strange humans assembled in a desert, or a paddock, to embrace their individuality and sense of community simultaneously.
Well, where do I fit in? I’m Dario. Long-time-freak, but first-time-Burner. Two highly decorated Kiwiburn veterans and friends suggested that for my first Burn I should try and join the team in some capacity. Ever since the Weta was escorted to Burning Man in 2016 I have lurked on Kiwiburn’s social media pages and watched the organised chaos with growing curiosity. I would’ve signed up last year, if You-Know-What hadn’t sent us into yet another You-Know-Which and dashed our hopes.
But Burners endure. It seems that Kiwiburn is as imperishable as the can of beans you bought in 2014. You know the one, it peeks out from your pantry with judgement each time you order UberEats.
So, here I am. Reporting for duty and aiming to fill the EFP with your weekly dose of informative sarcasm. I’ll be reporting on all the regular EFP type tidbits, as well as chronicling my journey from Kiwiburn’s outer orbit into the heart of its burning hot sun in occasional blog posts. See you on the Paddock!
Pictured: Dario playing the traditional music of his people. No credit required, I own this (unfortunately).